Day 60

Flu? I want to cry because I feel miserable.

I have to think that most people don't exercise and they eat comfort food when they're sick. I'm normalizing myself here attempting to not feel too pathetic about the last 3 days...I haven't even tried.

Meals
1 Fibre One caramel bar
2 cups of water

4 cups of water throughout the day

1 frozen thin crust personal pizza
1 cup of skim milk
9 gingersnaps
1 cup cookie dough ice cream
2 cups of water

Exercise
None

Notes:
-I have to think that this is only temporary and it will pass. Don't think I'm not ashamed of any of this. So quickly people think that oh, you're just fat and lazy and don't want to change. When changing 29 years of life there's bound to be speed bumps you're not prepared for. Every day that I do this I have to make a conscious effort to think about what I need to/should eat, and prepare myself the time to go exercise--the process is still majorly flawed most of the time. I still have to shower before the gym because I feel gross and ugly if I don't. Being sick has thrown me for a loop. My emotional self has got the best of me and I have been feeling childish and just "not caring" about any of this. In the pit of my heart I care, but sometimes it's just easier not to. I have taken the easy road and let myself go for a few days. I think sometimes we should all be entitled to do that. I've worked hard and it's not like I'm throwing this away. I just need a little time to recuperate. Sorry for showing the dark side, but this is what it is. I'm resilient and a fighter, and I'm not going to let this set me back too far for too long.

Day 59

Ugh, 'feel like I'm getting the flu. Slept most of the day. Headache all day despite Excedrin and a bath. 'Don't feel like doing anything and don't really feel badly about that.

Meals
1/2 chicken Marsala (l/o)
1/3 cup garlic mashed potatoes (l/o)
1/2 bread stick (l/o)
1/2 cucumber
1/2 cup cottage cheese 1%MF
2 cups of water

2 cups of water

Dairy Queen 1/4 pound cheese burger
Most of a basket of onion rings
Large cookie dough blizzard, extra stuff, no syrup
4 cups of water

Exercise
None

Notes:
-I don't care.